Spirituality vs Religion and about "I"

Religion is bogus, spirituality is experiential and thus is the only real religion. We have to see for ourselves and learn the lessons ourselves to really understand. And this is one big difference between religion and spirituality in my opinion.

Most religious people I have met only do what they do because they have been told by someone else that it is the right thing to do. They are blindly following guidelines because "God" says it's right. Their ego's are so tightly glued to their beliefs that any reasoning with them they take as an attack on themselves and they get angry.

Ofcourse they do. It's their whole story, it is who they think they are. Who the fuck would they be if all of a sudden everything they thought they are would dissolve? You see, the ego provides a very useful function in our lives on this planet.

How else would we know to protect ourselves? How else would we know to feed ourselves? How else would we know to not put our hands in the fire, stay away from things that makes us ill, gather foodies for the winter, dress ourselves warmly, spread our genes to ensure that the species lives on and fight when we have to?

Ask yourself this question: Where would you be without your ego? Probably dead. Long time ago. Spend some time thinking about that one if you havn't before. Use 5DC on your own ego.

So one of the functions of the ego is to ensure the survival of this body that we are in. It does so that we think that we are our thoughts, our minds, our body, emotions, the stuff we do, the things we have and everything else. Without the sense of self, there would be nothing to protect. If there was no other, there would be nothing to fear and we'd have become extinct long time ago.

Now ask yourself this question: "Who am I"? If you were like me when I first got asked this question I thought it was an easy answer.

Do you know, do you really know?

Are you your opinions? What happens if you change your opinions? Are you no longer you?

What's with taste, age, sex, fears, voice, body?
Whatever you change the "you" is still there.

Where is this "I" that everyone keeps talking about? Look around, see if you can find it. Try really, really hard. Seriously, do it. Sit down and look for it. Spend hours, days, weeks, months and years.
Everywhere you look, from every angle and every aspect, everything you thought you are, there is only constant change. If it can change and "I" am still who "I" am, then that which changed wasn't "I". Read that again. If it can change and "I" am still who "I" am, then that which changed wasn't "I". Where, who and what is this "I"? Begin by knowing that you do not know. Know that you do not know who "I" am.

If you can find an "I", that's not it, keep looking. Certainly sudden and big changes in who we think we are can make it feel like we are no longer who we are, but soon the sense of "I" will settle in and we'll accept the changes as part of us no matter how big.


The ego makes us believe that there is an "I". It is its function, and a very useful one at that. But we've all forgotten who and what we really are. We think that we are "good", "kind", "sad", "Fred", "Steph", "depressed" and all that. Our egos absolutely LOVE "bad" people because they make us "good". It LOVES "rapists", "murderers", "paedophiles" and "Hitler" because they give us something to compare ourselves with, something that makes us define "I".

"I am not a rapist, I am this". "I am not a murderer, I am that".

Guess what? What is in a murder is in you. What is in a rapist is in you. What is in a paedophile is in you. What was in Hitler is in you. Under different circumstanses you could have been just like them.

Some people reading that might be in total denial, "I would never do that, I'm a GOOD person" or "whatever, that doesn't apply to ME". Others might be knowing that it is true and feeling bad about it "what do I doooo? what do I doooo?"

Both are expressions of ego. Both are there because you think that you are something that you are not.

So why are people so stubborn? Why are they having such a hard time to change? Why are we sticking to our story of "me"? Why do we choose to be so unhappy? Our survival in this body depends on it. It is our strongest drive and it controls us like a puppet through emotions and thought. Our animal nature needs all of that, without it we wouldn't have survived a single day.

Realize that you do not know who "I" am. Realize that there is no "I". Realize that what is in a rapist, murderer and paedophile is in you and that you would have been the same in their situations.

I think that everything that we ever wanted and everything that we ever did was only because we wanted to be loved, we wanted to feel happy. Some things gives us a quick high, some things makes us forget how miserable we are but until we let go of "I", we'll never be happy.

Open your heart and love all the bad people, really love them. Can you feel the pain, agony and suffering that they have been through, just because they thought they were something they are not? Can you have compassion for everything they did and see that you would have done the same if you were in their shoes?

All that pain and suffering in the world, all because we have forgotten.


(from the ideagasm forums, for incredible advice visit www.ideagasms.net)

Relationships of New Order

To develop higher consciousness relationships have a look at these common mistakes humans make:

1. Never cover up your fears or insecurities
If you hold back your true feelings and are not able to speak your truth it will sooner or later destroy the relationship.
Covering this stuff is FEAR based and fear always leads to disharmony and inevitable pain. The degree of your intimacy will define the happiness/love of the relationship.
But be careful, i don't say be vulnerable to everyone. There are plenty of people out there who are not trustworthy. They must not judge you, thats the root of many fears.
In true compassionate relationships, it is really not about keeping the key for yourself as Dr. Paul says. Integrity is your key, and you don't give that key away, but eventually you will open the door.
When you think you can't trust another person have a look at yourself and find out if you can trust yourself first. Because if you can't trust yourself you are not able to see the trust in others.


2. A relationship is not there to make you happy
To have a successful relationship, it is important to already be HAPPY and INDEPENDANT. Many people seek the other sex to stop the feeling of loneliness and want to be loved. I know these are two basic human needs, but their fullfilment comes from within. It is to accept yourself fully as you are and to REALIZE that you are enough, losing approval seeking etc.
So a relationship should serve interdependence.


3. Lacking Polarity
It is like with magnets, the more you are polarized the more you attract. The world is full of polarization good-evil,earth-heaven, yeah only opposites make thinking possible. But only recently we get to know that it is the same with the masculine and feminine energy.
Androgyny is when couples get trapped into a rote routine of bickering, arguing and delegating equal decision making and equal everything basically. They have become equal. They become more like friends than LOVERS. What if you're putting out dominant and aloof vibes? You're going to attract back the kind of women that like being dominated, submissive and approval seeking. I will talk about the specific masculine traits and how to develop them later.


As you can see there are some characteristics which have to be developed (random order):

1. Vulnerability, Intimacy, Trust
2. Honesty
3. Integrity
4. Compassion, Love
5. Truth, Awareness
6. courage, Putting up with crap
7. Self-Love, joy
8. Freedom
9. Non-Judgement
10.Acceptance

==> Basically it's all the same: Transcending the ego, it all comes down to it.These traits are based on love, on saying yes to all what is. There's no morality behind it.


Furthermore as you can see it comes down to ultimate inner game, because a relationship reflects who you are and brings out every frame you hold. That's where many pickup artists crack, because all they did is learning some superficial techniques to get the girl.Also they are more likely to feel empty or even burdened because they miss the whole OFFERING. It is at a level of achieving a goal of desire and women should be no goal of desire because they are persons, not things. This is of no use anymore and that is why inner game is so powerful, because it spreads out to pick up, work, creativity, fun etc.

A relationship is about making yourself vulnerable, open up, share yourself, grow and discover each others core, to reach a depth in where you two become one. Where two become more than the sum of them.

Women's Insecurities and Games, a list

* Emotional outbursts

* Addictions to sexual validation/approval (flirting, cheating, leaking sex energy, etc.)

* Women test us

* They say one thing and mean something else entirely, then they expect you to know this and mind-read them

* They ask pointed or "loaded" questions

* They resist polarity and insist on confusing it with "controlling abuse"

* They pick fights, argue, and cleverly make everything your fault

* They say one thing, and then do another

* They seem to always try to control the relationship, and if you let them, they then hate you for it

* When you act distant, aloof they chase and want you... When you commit, love, and please them they get bored and run


(from the ideagasm forums, for incredible advice visit www.ideagasms.net)

"You're my one and only" aka Romance

We have still not realized that women prefer men who Love All Women. This does NOT mean "cheating" or flirting inappropriately. Women want the ladies' man, the charmer, the charismatic leader, the chivalrous guy who makes women smile AND makes their clitties tingle. It reminds them each and every day that they have found a true 'catch' that they can show off to their friends. Men have consistently tried to be "the romantic" who mistakenly says, "I only have eyes for you". But deep down, women know it's a lie, women know that we find other women to be a source of inspiration, healing, and love. We have also failed to recognize what has been right in front of our noses since the beginning of time: Women, deep in their Yin core, are 'bisexual'. This does NOT mean 'lesbian butch who hates men', it simply means that women are nurturing creatures who hold hands, go to the bathroom together, have sleepovers, play with each other's hair and makeup, and love to cuddle during a scary movie. MEN... do NOT "cuddle"! Yang energy is concerned with competition, observation, power. Yin energy is concerned with intimacy, socializing, and possesses very strong nurturing instincts.

(from the ideagasm forums, for incredible advice visit www.ideagasms.net)